Memoirs of a Wolf's Tears
by Weeping Wolf
Summary: A painful past, forced tears. A single leatherbound book will bring much sadness, but it might be the only way to find happiness.
1. A Million Ways

A/N: This will just be a quick paragraph or so. I kind of want to get the first chapter going now or I'll never get it started ever again. Well, I'm back to write more. This is a story I've wanted to write for a while now, actually a few years. I remember a while back, I thought, why doesn't he have enough of a background story? Well, I'm sorry but I haven't read any of the manga much, so I might get stuff wrong… I really need to pick them up again. But, if you know me, you know who this is about… And I'm using two past characters in a different way this time around. I also do not own the cast Inuyasha. Only a couple of characters I do own.

**Chapter 1:**

**A Million Ways**

* * *

_The man with the cerulean eyes and raven-black hair held up with a fur ribbon stared off towards the sunset, his bare feet grasping onto a boulder as a small doll stood grasped in his claws. Pointed ears flat against his head as his senses didn't exist. His eyes started to favor the dark cave he decided to visit this year in summer, while the trees were lush with emerald leaves. Sunlight peaked through these leaves and tried to appear on the Earth below. Holding up the doll, he sighed, "Hey Mom…" he smiled and scoffed. His eyes were filled of memory of him as a small innocent wolf youkai holding the wolf doll in his arms and smudges __of dirt across his cheeks. Lovely young women with white hair and the same blue eyes petting him on his scalp and a raven-haired scrawny man with emerald eyes laughing with them. But then, more images came along, a man with white hair and green eyes scowling down towards them from the shadows, along with him was a woman with night hair and blue eyes. He frowned and shook that image from his eyes__. The man heard voices calling for him from behind, and with that, he placed down the wolf doll and turned on his heels to continue his duties as Alpha-Wolf._

* * *

  
"Hey, Akuma… look what I found!" A blonde girl whispered to her friend and reached up to take a book of the shelves.

The other women with an Irish black cap over her white hair and cerulean eyes peering out of the shadows, "Hm?" Akuma walked over to the other girl and looked at the dusty book they found in the dark corner of the library. "Memoirs of a Wolf?" she repeated the title that was engraved in the leather-bound book.

"It's about Kouga…" the blonde girl smiled and handed her the book, "You've been searching for Kouga, have you not?"

"…True…" Akuma reached for the book and opened the first page, "Kouga… Okami…" she shivered as she read this familiar name, "The biography of the last Alpha Wolf Youkai" She laughed softly, "So he became an Alpha, eh?"

The two girls walked up to the counter and placed the book in front of the uptight elderly woman at the desk and Akuma handed her the library card. The Librarian took it in her long, painted nails and snorted as she gave the laminated card to the owner, "Thank you, Miss Okami…"


	2. A New Beginning

A/N: I am currently in the car and on the laptop writing this chapter. I will only have around an hour, so this whole chapter might not be completely written in the car. But anywho, I'm trying to get back into the writing saddle, so it might not be as perfect as I want it to be, but I bet once I get used to it, I'll be able to transform my conversation paragraphs into more descriptive pieces of works.

Edit: Okay, if you got the first message, I am sorry but I forgot to edit it the first time around, so I had to delete it and such, sorry for the confusion.

**Chapter 2: A New Beginning**

* * *

"How exciting is it to finally step a bit closer to finding Kouga, Akuma?" the blonde girl smiled, sapphire eyes glistening with delight as she looked over to her friend as they walked the streets of Modern-Day Tokyo.

Akuma continued to stare at the leather-bound book, reading Kouga Okami's name over and over, "Honestly, Ruby, I am somewhat scared.

"Read us the first chapter…"

"You trust me to read and walk at the same time?" Akuma asked nervously, but smiled. After her friend's no-comment reaction, Akuma opened up the book to the first chapter. "Kouga Okami was born in the beginning of Feudal Japan, near the Kyoto region." She paused to think about the words, "How do they know that?" she whispered before continuing, "He was the youngest son to the Alpha of the Wolf Youkai tribe, Kiba, and had lived with an older brother and sister." Akuma paused again, her breathing slightly slowed. She could feel Ruby's stare, and so she continued.

* * *

A small boy, no older than six in human years, yawned and rubbed his eyes of the sleep. A tuff of black hair bunched up on his head and curled over two cerulean eyes and tickled his pointy ears. Only wearing a blanket wrapped around his frail body, the young child stood up and walked to an 18 year old woman sleeping in the corner. He kneeled by her and stared at her beautiful face that was frozen in time when she reached the age of eighteen not too long ago, purely pale skin with silky hair of white raining down and two white wolf ears perking from the top of her head. She wore a simple purple yukata, which the boy knew this woman hated. "Akuma… wake up!" 

The pale woman popped opens her eyes to stare at the boy, waking her from slumber, "What is it, Kouga?" She used her arms to pull herself to a sitting position to face her younger brother, also wiping away the sand from her eyes.

"Brother Risu returns today!" Kouga's grin grew around his face, glimmering white teeth showing through his lips.

Akuma smiled and petted Kouga and smoothed out his black hair, "He does… but Mother must want me to get to work right away. Akuma stood up and tied her hair back in a coral-shaded ribbon of silk. "You'd better clean your bed if you don't want Mom yelling at you."

The young pup nodded and turned to go clean his beddings and left Akuma to stand there in her purple yukata. The female youkai growled and resisted to tear the cursed thing off, "Why can't I wear armor like the other wolves?"

"Because you are a lady!" a harsh voice came from the cave entrance Akuma and Kouga resided in. Akuma glanced towards the light that entered and saw a tall woman in a gray-toned kimono with the hair of night held in a tight bun and the eyes of blueberries, "And as a Lady, we are required to clean and cook."

"But, it's so boring." Akuma walked over to the lady, "Why can't Risu do it? He loves cleaning and cooking."

"He's a male, and is therefore required to hunt, gather, and fight." She turned on her heels and scoffed with a mutter of, 'idiot' flowing through her lips.

Akuma followed with pursed lips, softly mocking the woman just enough for her not to hear her inappropriate words, then recited, "Yes, Mother…"

* * *

Kouga waited upon a boulder, looking to the West, over a vast plain, searching for the faint specks of human figures that might be Risu or Kiba, "Will Risu bring us presents again?" 

"I don't know." Akuma smiled, she leaned up against the boulder, grateful Mother gave her the evening off to escort Kouga to the fields to wait for the men; that's one thing she liked about being the oldest, she always was put off-duty of womanly chores to watch her younger siblings.

The wind rushed through the thousands of stalks, making it seem like a golden ocean flowed around them with no fish in sight. At the edge, there was the beginning of the forest and that reached on to places neither Akuma nor Kouga have been allowed to reach. _'Only men are allowed to leave the __boundaries__,'_ Mother's words echoed through their brains like a broken records, along with so many famous and treacherous quotes. Kouga lowered his eyebrows and huffed, "They are late…"

Akuma's mouth stretched for a yawn before she replied, "Calm down, it's still light; moonrise won't be for another few minutes." She looked up to the orange sky, a dim light from the Sun.

"But the Sun is tired, Sister, it's almost halfway melted into the Earth." Kouga rubbed his own eyes and yawned.

Akuma glanced over to her brother, "You seem tired as well…" Akuma laughed and petted her younger brother on the top of his skull, "We should head back, and you can see Risu and Father when you wake."

"No!" Kouga gave a shrill cry and stood up on a boulder, his tiny feet barely grasping onto the gray rock and he crossed his arms, "I am a warrior, and I will not let a tiny thing as sleep take me down!" Jumping down from the boulder, he grasped a fallen twig from the ground in his chubby hands and pointed to the sky, "YAAAAH!" he roared and pointed the twig up to challenge the sky.

The female youkai smirked and picked up another stray twig and pointed it towards her sibling, "I challenge you, oh great Warrior Kouga to a battle for your lands!"

Kouga laughed and challenged her twig with his, "You have no power to defeat me!" The child swung harshly towards Akuma, only to have Akuma block his shot.

After plenty of these games with Kouga, and small tidbits of training from Risu, Akuma has grown strong in the skill of fighting. "My… have you grown weak!" Akuma guffawed.

"I will not allow you to win," Kouga began to swing randomly, every blow being blocked by his challenger.

Akuma smirked and purposely slipped, letting Kouga's 'sword' stab her swiftly under her arm, and a quick movement of the arm, Akuma stuck the twig between her arm and body to perform the image of being stabbed in the chest, "You got me, Great Kouga, I am no equal!" She dropped to her knees and fell backwards into the wave of wheat.

Kouga jumped and tackled Akuma, sitting on her stomach, "I am victorious!"

"You two at it again?" a familiar deep voice laughed from the right of the laughing siblings, who noticed it was now a starry canvas overhead in the sky, and stopped laughing.

Akuma and Kouga stuck their heads above the large wheat stalks and looked to the owner of the voice, knowing who it was immediately. There was a man, raven-haired and emerald-eyed, with a scrawny body covered with layers of armor. Behind him, many large brutes with years of muscles on their bodies making their way back to their homes, made this small man even more petite.

"RISU!" Kouga and Akuma shouted, Kouga jumping through the wheat to tackle his older brother. Akuma followed suit and smiled, "Welcome back, brother."

Risu picked up Kouga and held the child to his chest, and his eyes twinkled with joy, "Oh how great it is to be home and out of the battlefield."

"Risu, stop dawdling, and get back to Mother. We're already in trouble with being late. Same for you two as well." A deeper voice growled, the owner appearing behind Risu. He had silver hair pulled back tightly with a light tone of green for eyes, a burly man who looked like all the other soldiers around them.

"Yes Father…" the three kids muttered together, Akuma diverting her glare towards a small bug climbing a leaf, Risu shadowing his eyes behind bangs of black, and Kouga staring up to the large man with large innocent eyes of the twinkling sea. They knew to never disobey the very man who could make sure the whole pack could kick them out. With a spin on the heels, the family turned to head back to the den for food and celebration of another victorious battle. Kouga, still being held by Risu, glanced downwards towards Risu's hip and saw a sack that looked like it bulged with the hope of presents. Knowing that these presents were too sinful in their parent's eyes, Kouga kept to himself and would wait until Risu, Akuma, and himself were alone in the Den.

Reaching the den, their mother in the gray kimono with designs of silver thread at the hem and back, an upgrade from the simple gray yukata from before, with her hair gracefully held back, stood at the entrance and growled, "You are late… and Akuma, you must transform into a silk kimono, you can't go to the celebration tonight looking like a servant girl, you need to attract mates soon." Akuma growled and rolled her eyes before melting into the darkness of the den to change into her Mother's required kimono. The men stopped in front of the female, and stared at her. "That goes for the rest of you too."

Nodding in unison, they followed suit after Akuma to prepare for this large tradition of a giant feast around the fire with drinking sake and joking with family and comrades while the drunk men fondled with the drunken women, hoping for a little private celebration in the dark. While the pups who were not yet old enough to take part in such actions were given to Risu this year, for he 17 and 18 was the legal age, like Akuma who would be ordered by older forces to take part in the playful drinkings.

* * *

_Kouga growled, his cerulean eyes lonely as he stared off towards the Eastern sky towards a rising Moon, and he remembered that night where his only sister was __playful while they waited for Risu to join in the fun__, how she was so beautiful as she destined for a life unlike the one that was forced upon her back. The stars twinkled as if they were happy and so careless as they hung almost forever in the vast sky of onyx. Shutting the lonely-filled eyes from the world, he remembered her smiling face, how she laughed when they played soldiers together or splashing around in the river when they were assigned to catch carp for the dinner that evening. And Risu, obviously the most handsome male in the tribe, and the most useful in cooking and cleaning, Akuma and Risu both teased about how they were born the wrong genders, Akuma wanting to being a soldier and Risu wanting to perform chores that were assigned to the woman. Kouga flipped to his side and opened his eyes to a bug climbing a leaf, and sighed__, the images of Akuma's first adult-rated celebration danced teasingly through eyes who wanted to get through these horrible images, Kouga could hear the laughter of the drunks and the screams of a woman, the look of fear Akuma's tear-filled sapphire orbs that was her kind eyes__earlier, the taste of soil filled with the men's careless leaking and dripped sake still lingered on Kouga's tongue, the scent of the alcohol drifting like a mist from the adult's mouth, and the pain of the thrashings on their innocent bodies. _


	3. Innocent Eyes

A/N: HI! It's been around a year. Huh? I'm guess I'm not that much into the whole big writing biz =3. Buuuuuut, any who, I was reading my story again and … well; I wanted to pick it up again. It was actually pretty good! I'm getting into it again D. Sorry if this chapter is slow and lagging… I was half tired throughout this read. Also, I'm thinking about picking up an old fave.

Edit: Sorry about that =o, I was tired when I uploaded it the first time. Had to make a couple of changes.

**Chapter 3: Innocent Eyes**

Akuma refused to turn the page; she couldn't bring herself to do it. "Whatever did happen that night?" Her finger tapped the page she continued to be stuck on, the trouble with this book was she knew all the twists and turns but it continued to haunt her. Akuma lifted the sapphire orbs from the white and black world that haunts the corners of the mind. Outside was the concrete world of Tokyo, filled with the splats of colors every so often.

Akuma and Ruby didn't live in a house, but more of a two story apartment. They didn't hold suck great jobs but just enough to live on the top floor of their building. Akuma loved to relax in a glass patio that allowed her to release herself onto canvas or page. Right now, it was a place of reading her past. But there was something troubling her even more, how did Kouga's life ever be driven out during this time and space.

"Aku!" Ruby shouted when she ran down the stairs, her hair dripping with clean water and eyes playful as she searched for her friend.

Akuma was startled and nearly was floored by the burst of her playful friend. "Where's the fire, Roo?"

"You were reading without me," she pouted and shifted her eyes from Akuma's face to the book that had fallen onto the white carpet about their feet.

The startled friend noticed her eye shift and quickly grabbed the leather-bound book, "Sorry, I didn't get far. I got to… thinking." Akuma chuckled and opened back up.

Ruby rolled her eyes and sat in the chair opposite of Akuma, "You wolf demons are strange," she chuckled and passed over a small glass of iced tea which Akuma just noticed she carried down, "Here, to help you relax and keep your tongue dry, you have a lot of storytelling to do today." Ruby winked and leaned back, "So get reading!"

"Fine fine," the wolf girl stuck out her tongue and grabbed the tea and set it by her, but not before stealing a sip. Ruby always knew when she was thirsty, but then again, when wasn't she? Ruby has been a great friend, the only one who knew of her secret life as a demon. Of course, Ruby is a demon as well.

* * *

Kouga looked at the soft glow of a bonfire into the distance as it melted into the dark starry night. Kouga couldn't sleep like the rest of the pups in the den; the only other one awake in there was his brother Risu. "Kouga-kun," the deep voice snuck up behind him.

"Risu, do you think Aku is okay?" Kouga felt his finger traced the dirt around him, his eyes unwavering from the flickering sky.

Risu sighed and sat down again and patted the soft tuff of hair of his brother, "She's a strong woman." He soon grew worried as well, he knew the men of the village. He's heard their tongues admit the anticipation of this night, they knew Akuma was eighteen and available for mating. _If only I was allowed to attend…_ "But I know how you feel, Kouga… I'll stay up with you until she returns."

Kouga nodded, "Thank you, Ris…" he almost whispered the worlds, wanting to outburst and scream while escaping the den to help the sister. To be honest, he was afraid of his sister's return. He always knew of her as the strongest person he knew, but to see her come back drunk and flirting with a dirty old man as well as other suitors, carrying many pups that belonged to more than just one man. "Aku, come back, soon…"

The wolf woman rested her head on a nearby tree trunk, hands folded over her extravagant kimono, made of any color of silk there could be found. Akuma loved this kimono; it smelled deeply of her Grandmother as she gave this kimono to her from her dying hands. Grandma Okami was sweet and didn't allow Akuma to cook or Risu to hunt and was an ol' sourpuss who loved her grand-pups to death. Akuma shook her mind from the scent to look around, same this and same that. Men were fondling their mates while single men were looking for a mate. Akuma scoffed and drew the kimono closer around her, "Men…"

She wanted this night to end, she wanted to be considered a grown-woman and be left alone, not have her body looked over by pervious looks. She knew the men walked up and down her body daring each other to take the first step to mate the hottest girl in the village while the other new eighteen year old girls gave her dirty looks, after all, she was useless and woman chores and always stole the men's hearts away.

Akuma drew herself closer, wishing Risu or Kouga by her knowing that they would draw her mind and able to provide her with comfort. Senses dropped around her as thoughts drowned her away from the party.

"Hey Akuma," a gnarly voice pulled her through the water of thoughts and back onto land. As she opened her eyes, she saw one of the tribe's older men with stubble from an unwise shave with yellow eyes to match his yellow teeth. "How about a little fun? We don't want you all alone during your first party as an adult." He chuckled and drew closer to her.

Akuma snarled with flexed claws, "I'm fine just being alone."

"What's the fun in that?" he neared a finger and traced the slight bit of skin that was revealed above the neckline. "Why so uptight, babe?" the finger took a soft snag of the neckline and dragged the kimono open, revealing more skin inch by inch. Akuma took immediate action and attempted a hard punch to the man's mind but she soon realized a few other men had too part of the scene, her arms held back tightly along with her legs prevented from kicking.

Akuma growled and busted out a scream, only to be muffled by the free hand of another party go-er. Akuma cried as hard as she could, and searched the area for her parents, but they were drunk and having their own party as well, almost looked like they were encouraging her attackers. Salty tears fell from her eyes, the first time she has cried ever since she was a pup; the grainy fingers she felt on her skin were going lower on her body.

'HIYA" a shrill voice echoed around the party, and the grainy finger lifted itself with all the other pressures that held her released. Akuma opened her sapphire orbs to see what stopped her terror. A little fluff ball was biting down on the flesh of the attacker, but at first it was too dark to make the hero out.

Akuma stood up and fixed her kimono as her eyes adjusted to the dark around her, her focus stayed on the little man until, "KOUGA!" she cried and ran to her brother.

"You leave her alone you pervert!" Kouga shrieked and dug his fangs deeper into his skin.

The men chuckled, realizing what the attack was being performed by, "Pipsqueak, you think you can save her?" he pinched the scruff around Kouga's neck and tossed him to the ground, his wails shrieked the air.

Akuma grabbed the man by the collar and tossed him across the clearing, her snarls were even louder than Kouga's shriek, "BASTARD!" She paused and looked around her; noticing eyes were laid on her and heard the whispers of the topic of a woman beating up a male, unheard of. Akuma snarled at the group and ran to her brother and picked him up, noting the scratches and bruises on his soft body, "Kouga?"

Kouga's soft blue eyes popped open enough, "Am I your hero? Did I save the day?"

"Yes, Kouga…" Akuma smiled and hugged her brother closer, "You're the greatest warrior…"

"Bitch!" words were tossed behind her as a clutch took her kimono and threw her against a tree.

Akuma never let go of her brother as she fell to the ground, dirt flowing into her mouth. She leaned up on an elbow and coughed out the dirt, "What's wrong with you?"

The man towered over them, "I just wanted a little fun, and I guess I have to make this rougher to show you who is boss!" His strong hand speeded its way towards her body, holding no regret.

Akuma was afraid of hurting Kouga in resist; the only defense she held was her cry, "HELP!"

World blackened around her, waiting for the horror to resume, but there was something wrong. There was no hateful touch; there wasn't even a gentle touch, just the blow of the wind, cold dirt below, and the tears of Kouga soaking into her kimono and wetting her skin. A sapphire spear opened to the darkness around the two siblings, but the sight wasn't what she expected. A soft face of a young boy looked down upon her with the clearest blue eyes of the swallowing skies. "Are you alright?" his voice traveled sweetly into her ears. Akuma gave a nod, speechless of this sudden angel that saved her. A smile shown and sparkled along with his eyes as he lent a hand and helped her up. Akuma snuck a glance down to Kouga, cradled in her arms; he too was staring into the man's eyes.

"Um, sir?" Akuma almost whispered as she reached out to him. She paused once again when she saw the bonfire party, the man was knocked out and tied up while the crowd paused in confusion and drew away from the man, the fire reflecting their faces.

"No worries, miss." He lifted her up gently with one arm supporting her back and the other hanging on below her knees, "I'll take you home."

Akuma knew no words to say to him, only a nod. Why was this man so trustworthy? She would never allow any other man to touch her this way. Her surprise grew when she allowed herself to lay her cheek on his shoulder, it was… comforting. Hairs trickled over his shoulder and tickled her nose; his hair was a perfect midnight raven shade, almost made his face melt from the starry sky. "What's… your name?" the wolf girl felt like she was in ecstasy, why though? She waited for an answer to escape his lips when she realized why she felt drowsy; it was his smell; honeydew and the soft rainfall on the night of the full moon. "Are you… an… angel?" the words slipped out.

The man laughed, "Well, I guess you can say that," he winked, "My name is Tenshi, what's yours?"

"My… name...is…" she fell into darkness.

* * *

"_Tenshi…" Kouga stared at the den's ceiling, the wolves of his tribe snoring around him. He swears he saw the stupid smile of his forming on the creases in the rock. Growling the image away, he turned onto his side. 'Whatever did that man do for us anyway?' he scoffed as the image of his sister was drawn into the soil in front of him. That night scared him, just not the way he expected. A man did come home with Akuma, a perfect man who was like a friend to the three siblings. Slipping into slumber, Kouga remembered the morning of Tenshi's first stay and remembered the venerable look in Akuma's eyes. He hated that image, of Akuma being venerable and willing to serve. Never, his sister was always strong, his sister who showed the warriors of their village how someone should fight, his sister who protected her siblings and taught them all they must know of the world. She was wise, strong, and… in love. _


End file.
